blah! lots of hw. u know...just when u think ur all caught up...another nice big package comes in the mail for ya. hmm...which makes me think...i wish i got mail. haha..j/k. ya..and i should probably be doing my hw...but i can't focus at the moment...so let's blog shall we? ya!

so yesterday's Liwanag meeting was pretty cool. eh..i almost freaked out when i found out there was sharing involved...lots of it in fact. i think that was the first or second time i prayed out loud before. but it turned out not to be that bad. it was rather comforting in fact...sharing my prayer to God with others and listening to what their hearts needed to let out. in it's own way it was a cool bonding experience...bonding with God and with our Liwanag family. and i'm really glad that i didn't miss out on this meeting because sometimes i need to be forced to share in order to get use to it. slowly..but surely..i am. I'm one of those people who have to feel pretty comfortable around someone to tell them something rather personal about me. and i guess it shows how much i trust my Liwanag family...to allow them into my life and to accept them as a home for comfort. It's only been recently since I've been letting more and more people into my life. to allow them to see beyond the surface...behind the masks...and see the imperfect me that i want to hide because i'm ashamed. to allow myself to be vulnerable and to be known as imperfect. it's kind of scary. but somehow.....at the same time.....it feels so good. not only have i gotten to know others through this...but i've gotten to know myself as well. and i've reached this higher level of happiness that i've never been able to obtain. at the beginning..it's always scary...always....but once u let go...u won't go back. is it worth it? giving myself to someone who might walk out of my life one day...because that's how life works sometimes. even for that brief moment of closeness...of connecting to someone...I think it is. if that person has to leave...or if we go our separate ways...it's all part of God's plan. and he put that person in my life for a reason. it's like that footprints quote..."some people come into our lives and quickly go. They stay in our lives for a while and leave footprints in our heart and we are never ever the same". or something like that. so ya..it's definitely worth it. but i think the question is...am I worth it? is opening up and sharing a part of myself worth your time? or am i just a burden on your mind? and am i worth the chance of allowing people into my life...to be able to have a true friendship that will last a lifetime? i ask myself these questions...i think...hell ya! pssssh!! haha. =)

off to do more hw. =D